Demand Avoidance

Resistance or avoidance to everyday demands and requests impacting participation and cooperation.

  • Recognise that demand avoidance is often driven by anxiety and cognitive overload due to differences within the three key areas: sensory, information processing, and communication and interaction.
  • Ensure adults work in a relational way that promotes positive relationships and a safe environment.
  • Use consistent and predictable routines, with any changes being explained in advance, when possible.
  • Have an ‘if the unexpected happens’ plan.
  • Prioritise safety and regulation over academic learning.
  • Assess strengths and differences and ensure provision is meeting needs. For example, use their preferred communication style and ensure sensory needs are met.
  • Consider the developmental stage of the young person and ensure the demand is appropriate.
  • Use strategies that allow choice without requiring the child to make a decision, as this can increase anxiety. For example, put a water bottle down and say, “There’s a drink.” At break, put on your coat and say, “I’m putting my coat on as it is cold.”
  • Avoid direct instructions, which can support some children and young people (CYP). Use phrases like: “I wonder if you’d like to…” / “Maybe we could try…” / “Would you be up for…?”
  • Use flexible learning approaches, like self-directed tasks, project-based learning, or activities based on their interests, to create a sense of safety, predictability, and engagement. This will allow the CYP to complete the task.
  • Prepare for change: Give advance notice of changes and offer alternatives or adjustments.
  • Prioritise demands: Focus on essential tasks and be flexible with less important ones. This helps reduce overwhelm and build trust. Ask yourself, “Does this need to happen now, or can it wait?”
  • Introduce calming strategies like deep breathing, mindfulness, gentle movement, or stretching. This can help manage stress and regulate emotions. Remember to practice these regularly, not just during crisis moments.
  • Provide a safe space: Create a quiet, low-stimulation area the learner can access before or after dysregulation. This offers a sense of safety and a chance to reset. Tip: Include calming tools like sensory items, headphones, or emotion cards.
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